Bonding with your baby

Close and loving relationships

Babies are born very dependent on their parents. Their brains undergo huge development in the first two years of life. This development depends on a loving bond or attachment relationship with a primary caregiver, usually a parent.

Research in a relatively new branch of science called Epigenetics is showing just how important close and loving relationships with our primary caregivers are to our long term emotional health and wellbeing. The experiences of infants with their parents actually impacts their DNA and can positively or negatively affect the next generation.

The most important stage for brain development is the beginning of life, starting in the womb and then the first year of life.

Repeated interactions and communication lead to pathways being laid down that help memories and relationships form and learning and logic to develop.

Building your relationship during pregnancy will help you to become more responsive to your baby after birth and strengthen your bond. 

Stroking and talking to your bump, involving partners and other close family members will allow your baby to know they are loved before they are even born. 

After birth, extensive and repeated skin to skin contact with your baby, as well as responding quickly to their needs, interacting with them, with eye contact, talking and gentle touch will help them to form a strong attachment to you. 

If you are bottle feeding your baby, it is vital that you hold them close to you and watch them during a feed, interacting with them and follow their cues. 

Feeding skin to skin, and limiting feeding to primary care givers will help your baby bond to you and prevent them becoming stressed by being fed by others. 

Follow your instincts, you cannot spoil your baby by responding to them, instead, cuddling them raises their levels of oxytocin (love hormone) which acts like a fertiliser for their growing brains.

This UNICEF leaflet goes through the science of how communicating with your baby early on can enhance your bond once baby is born.  View the Unicef website and leaflet - building a happy baby.